The last two days have been difficult ones for me. I have had extreme cluster migraines. These make it very difficult for me to concentrate on anything. I haven't been able to be as active in the Facebook community and haven't even had a chance to read the last couple of Ali's blog posts. But I am still so happy to be participating in this event.
I have gained so much from being a part of this project this year. I have found value and purpose in my own life, I have reclaimed a part of myself that I had lost, and I have felt part of something huge happening across our world. It is so wonderful to see posts from and have conversations with people in New Zealand, Australia, Hong Kong, Paris, England, Sweden, and the good ole' US of A. I'm sure I have probably missed a couple of cities and countries!
Because of my disability I am unable to be as social as I would like and certainly not as social as I used to be. I was very active in my community, in my church, with my children and their activities, and with friends and loved ones. My world has gotten very small since I cannot commit to anything without a caveat of "unless I feel unwell". Most people don't want to hear that and there are even those that don't believe I have these migraines (that's why it is sometimes referred to as an "invisible disability"), and others think I use them as excuses. Being part of this community of people that spans the globe has given me an incredible gift of joy, of laughter, of sharing, of inspiration, of support, of being able to encourage others and share my thoughts and ideas without fear of censure or judgment. I love that! The "official" 7 days are almost over and I find myself feeling sad. I hope that the community page will stay up on Facebook for a while and that folks will continue to post there and also on Ali Edward's community page.
Part of my scrapbooking process has always been mulling things over before committing the photos and products to paper or to a saved file (if I'm going digital). I've tried to let go of the frustration of feeling unwell and use the time that I can't really concentrate to sort of let things "gel" in my head. I've spent several days looking through sketches, going through my stash for products to use and looking at the photos I've taken and weeding out the ones I won't use. I have done my title page and I keep looking at it like a new baby! I love it! I love that I have finally made a scrapbook page for the first time in a long time, and I love how it turned out. I love the colors and the way it came together. I love the text that Ali so generously gave us, and I love that I have been able to overcome the negative feelings that had become associated with my love of papercrafting.
I'm hoping that tomorrow will be a better day, health wise, and that I can really put in some time creating layouts. I hope that this experience has been as awesome for the rest of the group as it has been for me. I know that there are some that have felt discouraged, but I hope that somehow, whether they decide to finish or not, that they have found something wonderful to take away from it this year and to remember with joy!
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